sure
for a catholic
 Oct 19, '09, 1:20 pm | |||
| |||
 Does God tell people specific things? For a while I have been praying for something very important to me. It has to do with a specific person in my life that I have very strong feelings for. (See this thread http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?p=5624427 for more details on the situation.) One day, about a week after I posted that thread, I was thinking about it, and suddenly I felt a voice inside me saying "it will come when the time is right." I immediately new that this was god telling me that he was going to let me be with this girl someday. I felt overjoyed with faith because it felt like all the waiting I have done for all these years have been worth it. A few weeks later, I felt the same feeling again. I felt great. It seemed like God was telling me the answer was "yes, but not now." Every night when I prayed I would thank him for his answer. My mother is a strong christian just like me, but I wanted to keep it a secret what I felt because I new she would think that I was crazy because she doesn't always see things the way I do. She doesn't meditate on things the way I do. Well, yesterday I accidentally spilled the beans on her and we had a huge argument about it. She says that I'm delusional and living in a fantasy world. I tried to explain to her that she doesn't know what I felt. She said that, while I probably did feel something, it wasn't him telling me that they were going to break up and that we would be together, she thinks he was just telling me that things were going to be alright. But I know what I heard. I was specifically thinking about her when I got that feeling. My mom thinks that what happened last night was God telling me that the answer was no, that I was headed down a delusional path, and to just wait and everything will be okay, but not with her. She argues "you're going to just keep waiting and waiting until you're 50 years old and have waisted your life!" I don't know what side to listen to. When I believed that God was telling me to be patient and I would be able to be with this girl someday, it gave me piece, but what if she's right and I end up wasting the rest of my life because of it? The other side makes me anxious and impatient about not knowing who I was meant to be with, and not knowing where to find her, and being afraid that I won't like her as much as this wonderful, amazing girl THAT I HAVE BEEN IN LOVE WITH SINCE WE WERE IN THIRD GRADE. She is very rare and one-of-a-kind and I have looked and looked and looked and haven't found anyone else as great as her. I was sure that God was telling me that if I waited, things would change, her relationship with her Fiance' wouldn't work out (hopefully before the wedding, which isn't for another two years from now), and that she would finally see me as more than just a friend. I really really believed that. It's hard because, for as long as I can remember, I always wanted to get married to someone who I had known since I was a kid. I suffer from very severe social anxiety that makes it difficult for me to meet new people. I feel most comfortable around people who I have known for a long time. That's a big part of the reason why she means so much to me, and why I believed that she really was the one after all these years. I really felt Him tell me that. I believed that I just have to mature a little to earn her companionship. When I believed that I had heard God tell me we would be together, Everything that had happened to me over the years finally started making sense. For example, I felt that the reason why in High School she seemed to like every other boy more than she liked me (she was probably doing this because she knew I liked her and didn't want to accidently give me the wrong idea or anything) is because it's all going to be worth it in the end. The reason why another very close friend of mine died in a car accident 4 years ago is because God wanted me to be emotionally mature enough to be in a serious relationship. The reason why she had to go through 2 other serious relationships before me is because if it had happened any sooner it wouldn't have worked out. I also feel that she has to go through a traumatic breakup in order for her to relize that what she really wanted is something that she had never considered before. Am I crazy for thinking all of this? Is this all this just stuff I made up in my head? When I believed that the answer was "yes", I felt at peace, and it was much easier to keep my mind positive, and I felt that I had more faith than I have ever had before. When I believe that the answer is "no", it makes me feel anxious, impatient, unsure, and frustrated. I really thought I felt him tell me. Was what happened last night just a test of my faith? Or was it him trying to snap me out of some delusion?  |
| #2 Oct 19, '09, 2:12 pm | |||
| |||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? I suppose time will tell. If it was God you heard, the girl will break up with her boyfriend and end up with you. God always keeps His promises. And while I couldn't possibly say either way if it were God or not, if I were a betting girl, I'd say it is wishful thinking on your part. This girl has had many years to have you as her boyfriend if she wanted to. She doesn't. I am sure she likes you alot, you seem like a great guy.. but she clearly does not like you in that way. Your Mom is right.. if you remain fixated on this particular girl, you will waste your whole life longing for something you aren't meant to have. God may bring the RIGHT girl into your life and you won't even notice because you're waiting for Miss NOT Right to dump her boy friend. How sad would that be? Sorry you feel this way. Honestly, I think you've made this girl into so much more than she probably is. We tend to do that with things we can't have. Maybe she's a great friend, but not such a great girlfriend? You really don't know so why waste so much energy on someone who is already taken, and even if you could have her, you may not be compatible with after all? Forget about her is my advice. __________________ "To love another person is to see the face of God." -Victor Hugo |
| #3 Oct 19, '09, 2:21 pm | |||
| |||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? You sound just like one of my best friends about 6 years ago! She was totally fixated with this one guy, and she felt like God was just giving her sign after sign that they would be together. She was obsessed! Eventually, eh found a girl, got engaged, and she still believed they'd break up and she'd get him in the end if she just waited. He married his fiance, and my friend was crushed. She got over it, fell in love for real, married, and is now trying for her second kid. Basically, what I am saying, is that as hard as it is you have to put her on the backburner. I know you totally love her, and that is awesome, but are you going to be able to let her go when she marries? You can't persue a married woman. This isn't to say it will never happen, it could, but the chances are very slim. If God spoke to you, great! But don't close all your doors. Keep your eyes open, and try to work on moving on NOW. If it is meant to be, then it will happen! But you don't want to miss your wife by pining over someone else. Espcially when that person is engaged. You also stand to damage your friendship. If she does marry, and you feel let down, do you think your friendship could survive that? Be her friend for now  |
| #4 Oct 19, '09, 2:30 pm | ||||
| ||||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Wow, what a story! I am so sorry for all the pain you've been going through... The answer to your thread is that yes, He does tell certain people specific things. For example He told me to go to pray outside an abortion clinic next week (even gave me the day!) But it's not that simple. Sometimes we make things up in our minds, which I'm sure annoys God to no end, especially when we feel so strongly about something and God doesn't have an answer. Or what He tells us might be sort of ambiguous to comfort us, like He might mean that in time you'll meet another girl a million times better. Or that you'll become a priest  (couldn't help it )The point is, sorry, you can't really know.  I'd recommend going to adoration as often as you can, and for a really long time. I find that spending some serious time in adoration tends to give answers. __________________ “I think You’ve gone mad in Your love for us.” St. Catherine of Siena, to God |
| #5 Oct 19, '09, 3:05 pm | ||||
| ||||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Yes, I agree. God does speak to us over specific things. But what He is saying to you in effect is, "Just trust Me. I have a plan for your life. Everything will work out for the best if you will only trust Me." I knew someone in exactly the same position as you. She quoted scripture which she interpreted as God promised her the man of her dreams. She wasted 10 years of her life on this man who only looked on her as a friend. She kept saying that God had told her that he was the man for her. But I remember another friend saying; "Yes, but if God wanted her to marry this man, then He would also put it in the heart of this man the desire to marry her." If I were you, I would try to stand back a little. Try not to worry about the future. It is God's hands. Take up some voluntary work amongst those less fortunate than yourself, etc. If it is meant to be it will happen. God loves you very much and He only wants the best for you. Just concentrate on serving Him for the present. Everything will work out for you in God's own time. May God bless you and ease your pain and suffering. I know you are hurting very badly just now and I wish I could comfort you and give you a big hug. Take care now. Be patient. Everything will work out fine. Just wait and see. |
| #6 Oct 19, '09, 3:41 pm | |||
| |||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Well, I suppose I should chime in since I've experienced both things you're going through; namely, a girl that I was fixated on for many years, and words from God along with certain knowledge of what they meant - although they were not related. I still know with certainty what God told me, and I've never had a doubt. The thing with the girl worked out the way a previous poster said it would - we were always just friends. But that doesn't mean it always turns out that way. Nor does this mean that you should put your life on hold. What this knowledge should do is remind you not to do anything that might cause permanent damage to your relationship with this girl. Meanwhile, you should live your life as you normally would with her as a friend who is engaged to somebody else. That means date other women, and pursue your vocation. In short, seek God's will for you and obey His voice. If you are discerning what you heard correctly then it will happen on God's good time. But it is not disobedience to proceed with your life as though you will not marry her. On the contrary, it could all be part of God's plan. For example, maybe if she sees you with a certain girl she might experience something she never expected - jealousy. Again, this is not your motive. Your motive is to live your life according to God's will, and if that includes a vocation to marriage then you should date. The other thing you should keep in mind is that to those whom God has given much, much will be required. You should strive for holiness, and for pure intentions. If you put God first, and not your own desires, then you will be better able to discern His will for you. God bless. __________________ Therefore as sin came into the world through one man and death through sin... so one man's act of righteousness leads to acquittal and life for all men. (Romans 5:12,18) |
| #7 Oct 19, '09, 3:43 pm | |||
| |||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Quote:
|
| #8 Oct 19, '09, 4:03 pm | |||
| |||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Hi Dane, Your story has a very familiar sound to it. I have a similar story: a girl much like yours, a close relationship with God, my social anxiety, and I even lost one of my closest friends in a car accident, so when I read your post, I felt like I should share my story with you, that maybe it could be a 'sign' for you, or at least give you someting to think about. So here's my story: I remember being infatuated with a girl, praying often and devoutly (I thought) and asking for signs, getting "hints" that my prayers would be answered, that we would "be together" whatever that meant. I felt like I was answered with a "yes" on several occassions. I remember the very warm feeling of happiness in those moments, overwhelming me, running through me from head to toe. I was very comforting and I long for those moments sometimes. And maybe there was an even more specific phrase that was said in my head, but now I can't really remember. There have been occassions before and since then when I have heard that specific voice, and it has been a great comfort to me. Long story short, two things happened: 1. I ended up dating (briefly) the girl in my story, only to realize she and I were not right for each other. Just an example, she didn't want children and I always knew I did. I think I actually broke her heart back then, and it's not what I wanted. I can't fully explain it, but it was as if I had made her out to be something she wasn't, and when we finally dated, it just wasn't right. Anyway, both of us went our separate ways, and are now married to other people, very happily. I met my wife four days after I broke it off. 2. After a period of laxity in my prayer life, I developed in my spiritual life far beyond the selfish prayers of my youth when I was so focused on my plans to be with this girl. I found God's love to be so much more than I had imagined, and I started to focus more on Him than on myself. I would ask you two questions, and I would hope you would think about it for a while and consider the implications carefully: 1. If you do not end up with this girl, will you be angry with God? 2. Once you have convinced yourself of the answer to that one, ask yourself if you are living for God's glory or for your own. It sounds to me like God has a plan for you. He's given you signs and allowed you to experience his presence. He has allowed you to suffer loss, but in doing so you grow closer to His Son. Trust in Him, seek Him out and know that what he holds in store for you is far better than what you desire for yourself. One of my favorite expressions is: "We plan, God laughs." I hope this helps you, I remember what it's like to be in your shoes. |
| #9 Oct 19, '09, 4:46 pm | |||
| |||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Quote:
Is it possible you hear God "talking to you?" Absolutely. God is all Powerful. all Knowing and a VERY Personal God. That friend is my "Objective opinion." My Subjective opinion is that it's at best a "maybe." God does answer all prayers, in HIS TIME, and in HIS WAY, depending on what is best for our spiritual growth and His Glorification. It is quite possible to ask God for something [someone] who may not be best for our spiritual growth and His Glorification. It is ALWAYS BEST to include and end each prayer with a "Not my will but THY WILL be done Oh Lord." In doing so, we leave the decision up to God, and as a further benefit, should God DESIDE that what we ask is not "best" for us, God will supply abundant graces to deal with His deciding to say "NO." God promises to answer all prayer, but NOT necessarily as we asked. As a LOVING FATHER God only grants good gifts.  The issue you are praying for is a highly charged emotional issue. The reason I bring this up is Satan CANNOT effect our freewill [nor can / will] God. Satan gets to us through our emotions. That is the gate that "swings both way's." My advice friend is to do two things. 1. Add what I suggest to your prayers effective at once. 2. Make an appointment with you're parish priest outside of Confession, and discuss the issue candidly with him, knowing very often God sepeaks to us through others, especially His Priest. Love and prayers, Pat __________________  PJM  http://working4christ2.wordpress.com Can we partake of God's GLORY and NOT partake of His PASSION? NO! A.B. Fulton Sheen: "The truth is the truth even if nobody believes it, and a lie is still a lie, even if everybody believes it." |
| #10 Oct 19, '09, 5:14 pm | |||
| |||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Quote:
God Bless. __________________ "To love another person is to see the face of God." -Victor Hugo |
| #11 Oct 19, '09, 6:51 pm | ||||
| ||||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Quote:
http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=388702Are you Catholic, btw? __________________ “I think You’ve gone mad in Your love for us.” St. Catherine of Siena, to God |
| #12 Oct 20, '09, 11:06 am | |||
| |||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Quote:
Quote:
I've already made up my mind- I'm going to keep believing that I heard him tell me that she was the one for me, but I'm also going to be a little more open minded just in case God is planning to bring me someone better. |
| #13 Oct 20, '09, 11:30 am | ||||
| ||||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Quote:
I have to totally concur with this. I have been in the EXACT position as you (only I didn't go to school with the so called loves of my life). I wasted a LOT of time waiting and wandering instead of being realistic. I think back and there were a few guys around that I wish I had gotten to know better but I was obsessed with someone else. Please don't do what I did. Pray for guidance (say "Help Lord!" if you have to..trust me, it works!) Pray for strength to not think about her so much and for the Lord to help you steer your mind elsewhere. In the meantime, stay busy. And you never know what may cross your path...be open. I will keep you in my prayers, I so understand what you are going through. (And yes, I think God does speak to us, usually an unexpected thought crosses our mind..it has happened to me as well. But as the Lord cautions, test the spirits and see if they bear good fruit..) |
| #15 Oct 20, '09, 1:39 pm | |||
| |||
| Re: Does God tell people specific things? Quote:
It is palced into a gold vessel called a "Monstrance" which is often quite ornate. The special host [special by size alone], made specifically to fit into the Monstrance is placed on the center of the altar of sacrifice, for "latria" Worship, which is the Church Term for "Worship of God alone!." Often there is a special Church service of songs and prayers that go along with this recogination of God in our midst. This service is termed a Benediction." Some Catholic Churches have "Perpetual Adoration" in a seperate chapel, where one or more people are always in adoration. By Tradition, the Exposed Host is never without at least a single adorer. Love and prayers, Pat Try it you'll like it and so will our God! __________________ PJM http://working4christ2.wordpress.com Can we partake of God's GLORY and NOT partake of His PASSION? NO! A.B. Fulton Sheen: "The truth is the truth even if nobody believes it, and a lie is still a lie, even if everybody believes it." |
No comments:
Post a Comment